indigently | 𝒪𝓅𝑒𝓃 𝓅𝑜𝓈𝓉 🏛️

[ He assumes that it will be over the moment it begins, and he's right. Alhaitham responds immediately with the biggest reaction he thinks he's ever seen from the other— the noise of surprise, the hands pulling back before pushing him away. Kaveh expected it, but it still hurts, and for that split second he's left looking up at the other's face with burning eyes and cheeks, an apology on the tip of his tongue and a hollow ache in the pit of his stomach. He fucked things, he knew even as he leaned in for the kiss that it would fuck things and he did it anyway, getting caught up in the swirl of emotions like an idiot..

He watches coppery green eyes widen, and his lips part toward another apology, the panic rising in his throat. Gods, what has he done—

But the space is closed as quickly as it is formed, and Alhaitham's mouth is on his again, and the sound Kaveh makes is one that's soft and shaking, not of surprise but of genuine want, something he can't hide as his eyes sink shut once more. His arms lift, curling around the younger man's shoulders; he sighs and follows the tilt of his head, lips parting easily under the gentle, searching motions of Alhaitham's tongue.

He's wanted this, so badly.

With his arms wound around Alhaitham's shoulders, one hand lifts, fingers cupping around the side of his neck to anchor them against one another, body shifting in closer so that they're properly flush. His tongue brushes up to taste the younger man's and his mouth in turn, another soft sound on his lips when he does. ]

[ They're kissing. Alhaitham is kissing Kaveh and Kaveh is not balking or pushing him away or any of the myriad of things Alhaitham has thought up in his nightmares. No, Kaveh is kissing him back and he's making noises. Noises of want, eager for Alhaitham to kiss him and that's all Alhaitham has ever wanted.

He kisses him harder then, the hand on his shoulder dropping to wrap around his waist and press his chest against Kaveh's even more. The hand holding his cheek grips him firmly as the kiss turns needful, desperate. Alhaitham has wanted to kiss Kaveh for so long, he wants to devour him. He doesn't want idle kisses between two scared teens that he imagined way back when. He wants to claim Kaveh, to make him his.

It's what has him pressing Kaveh back, a step or two before he's pressed against the wall next to Alhaitham's bedroom door. Then the hand on his cheek moves, pressing his arm flat against the wall and clenching his hand into a fist as he kisses Kaveh with want, with hunger, with a deep-seated possessiveness. ]

[ If Alhaitham enjoys the noises that Kaveh is making, then he'll be rewarded by the blonde's response to the way he presses harder into the kiss. As it turns into something hungrier, more desperate between them, as he finds himself pressed into the wall with the taller man bearing down on him, the sound Kaveh makes is less of a gasp or whimper this time but actually a soft moan. His fingers tangle roughly into the other's hair, tugging him in yet closer as he meets the other's need with his own.

And he's terrified, can feel his heart racing against his ribcage in the beginnings of a panic, but wrapped up in the enormity of his desire, he ignores it for now as best as he can, shoves it forcibly to the side. He can deal with it later; afraid as he is, he's not about to ruin the best thing that's happened to him in years out of fear.

(But what if this is just physical for Alhaitham? What if this doesn't change anything?)

Fuck, he needs his head to shut up.

Desperate for more closeness, Kaveh shifts, angling himself so that his leg is slotted between the other man's, allowing them to press closer with yet more freedom. His teeth nip at the younger's lower lip between kisses, breath coming short and sharp, heralding the panicky drive of his heart. ]

Please—

[ A single word, breathed out between kisses and then forgotten. What does he want, apart from everything? ]

[ This is perfect. This is perfect. Alhaitham feels the way Kaveh arches up into his kisses, presses harder into them, and then he swallows down Kaveh's moan in its entirety, shivering slightly from his arousal. The fingers in his hair are good, the leg pressed between his own is even better and he continues to kiss Kaveh with a desperate need.

But he also feels Kaveh too. The slight shaking of his fingers, the fast beating of his heart, he knows Kaveh is still in his head somewhat even as they kiss like neither of them can get enough. He hears the please and knows Kaveh is asking for more but he thinks Kaveh might be asking for reassurance as well. So when Alhaitham pulls off the kiss, when he starts pressing kisses to Kaveh's jaw, down to his throat, scraping teeth across his skin, he also says — ]

Stop thinking, Kaveh.

[ He lifts his head then, presses his forehead against Kaveh's and looks at him. Bright emerald eyes seeking out crimson as he crowds Kaveh up against the wall and tries to make Kaveh's world narrow down to him, just him. ]

How do you feel about me? Just say it. The truth.

[ And before he can freak out, there's reassurance as Alhaitham follows up — ]

Because I'm in love with you.

[ It's like a weight has lifted off his chest the moment Kaveh kissed him. Like the fear has dissolved and there's only Alhaitham's single-minded focus as he reorients his life around this. Kaveh's not drunk. Kaveh kissed him because he has feelings for him. He's not sure the depth of those feelings but they're there which means Alhaitham has a chance. Which means right now, as Kaveh starts to panic even as he loses himself in the kiss with Alhaitham, Alhaitham has no qualms about saying the truth anymore. He's never been a liar anyway. ]

[ As that one word falls off his lips, stolen between kisses, the pounding of Kaveh's heart in his chest only intensifies. He's asking for more of this, that much is obvious, but he's also seeking something else, something else he can't quite quantify. All he knows is that he wants his brain out of the equation, to stop the second-guessing and the fear in favor of letting him actually enjoy this the way he wants to. After all, the outcome after this will be the same regardless of whether it's stressing about it or not, so he should just—

Kisses press down the line of his jaw, his throat, teeth scrape against the skin, and Alhaitham tells him before lifting his head to stop thinking, and a shiver runs down Kaveh's spine. ]

Nn? Alhaitham, you—

[ Once again, the younger man knows him better than he anyone else possibly ever could. His breath catches, anxiety on his lips, but Alhaitham crowds him in until it's just the two of them, until there's nothing past him or around them for Kaveh to seek in the name of escape, allowing him only this and nothing else. Stop thinking, focus on Alhaitham and Alhaitham only, even as he asks a question that makes crimson eyes widen and well, with Kaveh's escape already taken from him. ]

I—

[ He chokes on the words, feels them clog his throat, the panic speeding his heart to an impossible degree; he's fucked up, he started this by kissing him when he should have just walked away, and now he's trapped,

and Alhaitham is in love with him

and Kaveh blinks, slow and unsure like he's awoken from a nightmare, eyes widening as he peers owlishly up at the taller man, as one hand falls from around the other's shoulders to fist into his shirt, all but clinging— ]

You are?

[ His voice cracks on the words, uncertain and unsure. ]

Really?

[ And now, Kaveh needs gentleness. That's what Alhaitham decides when he watches the other man look up at him with such big eyes, such open vulnerability on his face. He knows he needs the reassurance, to know that Alhaitham isn't just saying it to say it but truly means it. There's no way his anxious brain will accept it otherwise and Alhaitham knows it.

So, he moves a hand, cups Kaveh's cheek while his other arm remains braced against the wall. With his hand he tilts Kaveh's head up to him so he can lean down and kiss him ever so gently. It's a soft, sweet kiss, none of that desperate hunger from before and just soft intimacy instead. He'll kiss him for a long moment before pulling away and he doesn't pull away too far. Just enough so he can rub his nose against Kaveh's, sweet. ]

Of course I am. I — [ He cuts himself off, uncharacteristic. But he's never had to voice these feelings before, never had to put them into words. He never had a friend he could talk about this with because really, that friend would've been Kaveh. Vulnerability doesn't really have a place in Alhaitham's life.

But he swallows, he takes a breath, he explains himself. ]

When we were students together, I was... smitten but I never did anything about it. Then you ended our friendship and I thought that was that. When we met again, when I offered my place, it wasn't because of my feelings but after being with you a while, they resurfaced. Stronger now. It's not just childish teenage affection. I know you and I want you.

[ Because really, isn't that love? To know someone so entirely and so thoroughly as Alhaitham knows Kaveh and to still want them, to still desire them, to still crave them as he does? He knows he's in love. He knows it more than anything else. ]

[ For a moment, Kaveh can offer nothing more than terrified silence, and then Alhaitham's mouth comes down on his and he knows. The words that follow clarify, confirm, but the kiss is what tells him, all feeling and gentleness and words that shouldn't need to be spoken, even if Kaveh needs to hear them. It's silence that remains on his lips as Alhaitham talks, explains himself, tells their history from his perspective— he's had feelings since they were students, he says, and Kaveh has never felt so stupid. All this time, he's been running, throwing up walls like his life depended on it, and— ]

Alhaitham...

[ He's lost for words, but his mind is alight with feeling and thought. Over and over, all he can think is how much of a fool he's been, how much time he's wasted for them.

Fresh tears sparkle in the corners of his eyes, and the dam of words breaks. ]

I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I've been so busy trying to put walls between us that I didn't see you looking at me too. Of course I'm in love with you. I have been for so long, Alhaitham. But I was— I'm scared. What if things fall apart again? What if you realize.. what if you see me and you want to leave?

[ He's trying to explain himself in turn, but he doesn't realize he's talking in potentials even now, rather than thoughts he's had in the past. ]

I couldn't handle it. I can't lose you, not again.

[ Now, perhaps, his desperation in trying to push Alhaitham away from him will be clearer. ]

[ It is clearer but it's also nothing that surprises Alhaitham really. His mind works quick and the moment Kaveh confesses that he loves him too, he can see exactly how Kaveh thought to protect himself from Alhaitham, from losing Alhaitham, by not giving him any room in his life. Kaveh's anxiety is not a mystery to Alhaitham, not hard to follow the logic of, and so he knows exactly why Kaveh treats him like he does in a manner of seconds.

Which means Alhaitham can only sigh, bringing his other hand down to cup Kaveh's face with both hands and press a kiss to his forehead, to his nose, his cheeks. He leans his forehead against Kaveh's after, green eyes meeting red once again as he just looks at him for a moment with a soft expression on his face. ]

I already see you, Kaveh. Is there anyone else who knows you as well as I do? Who understands you? You hate how much I do, constantly complain about it in fact. But if I can know you this well and still love you, doesn't that absolve all your fears?

[ He'll kiss him on the forehead again before sliding his arms around Kaveh's shoulders, hugging him to his chest. He's finally able to do all the things he ached to do, to soothe Kaveh, whenever they did have conversations where Kaveh was clearly going off the rails because of his anxiety. Now, Alhaitham has permission. ]

I'm not an idiot, Kaveh. I know I can't convince you in one conversation, with just a few kisses. I know it'll take some time and I'll have to put in the work. But can you believe me when I say I'm willing to? That I want to? You know me well enough to know I wouldn't say that if I didn't mean it. I don't do anything I don't want to do.

[ And then, a little quieter, a little more vulnerable: ]

But... I do love you, so don't reject me, please.

[ Kaveh is quiet as Alhaitham talks, letting the other man kiss his forehead, nose, cheeks, forehead again, before pulling him in to a closer embrace, arms right around his shoulders. Somehow, he understands— but perhaps Kaveh should have known he would. After all, what he says is true: there's no one who knows him better than Alhaitham knows him. The younger man has seen every mistake Kaveh has ever made... and somehow, against all odds, he's still here.

He's still here, and he doesn't want Kaveh to be afraid, and he knows it won't come that easily, but he's willing to put in the work, and...

Gods, how did he possibly get so lucky, that this man is in love with someone like him?

Kaveh ends up pulling back to look up at him right as the younger man finishes his statement, admits to his own vulnerabilities, and Kaveh's heart pounds in answer. Once again, he's been so selfish, hidden in his own insecurities and forced Alhaitham to speak up first with no idea of where it could possibly go for him to do so. In his desperation to protect himself, he's made the other feel like he's worth less to Kaveh than he really is.

He's been such a fool. And Alhaitham is right, it will probably take a while, and there'll be times when he doubts and worries and gets caught up in all his own feelings about it again, but at least for now...

Kaveh reaches up, and this time it's his turn to cradle the other's face in his hands, looking up at him with a soft, sweet smile. ]

I'm not rejecting you, Alhaitham. I love you too. And.. and I believe you. I trust you.

[ At the hands on his face, Alhaitham looks up into Kaveh's eyes again and leans his head into Kaveh's touch. He doesn't let go of him, not wanting to be apart from him for too long and not wanting to risk all of this falling apart between his fingers. He's been brave, admitted his feelings and asked Kaveh to love him back and Kaveh... does. He does love him. It's such a fulfilling feeling, such a warm thing that he can't quite believe it.

He's not being rejected. Alhaitham doesn't think he's a very anxious person, doesn't particularly care about other's opinions on him and rarely wants anything in the first place. But he wants Kaveh, he wants to be with him, and the small risk here that that wouldn't happen left Alhaitham feeling... bereft. Now that he knows Kaveh wants him back just as much as Alhaitham wants him, he's feeling... really fucking good.

I believe you. I trust you. Things he's always wanted to hear from Kaveh, even more than I love you. He's never had anything but the best of intentions for Kaveh, even with their diametrically opposed philosophies. It doesn't mean he never cared for the other man, it doesn't mean he didn't want the other man. And now after his confession, when Kaveh could've so easily questioned him and his intentions like he always does, Kaveh instead believes him.

It fills Alhaitham with a relief he wasn't expecting. ]

I'm... happy. [ It's a strange thing for Alhaitham to admit, he's never been a particularly joyous person. ] I'm really happy, Kaveh.

[ He turns his head to kiss the center of Kaveh's palm, leaning his head back into it and gives Kaveh a warm, gentle smile. ]

[ It would have been all too easy for him to question Alhaitham's intentions the way he usually would. The degree of his self-loathing makes it difficult for him to trust when others say kind things. And yet in this case, he allows himself to believe in it. The reasoning, too, is simple, and it comes from the earnestness written all over the other man, the way he speaks so openly and honestly, the way Kaveh can read the hesitation and nervousness in his statements, heralding the need to protect his own feelings.

So he believes, and he's rewarded.

Kaveh watches the expressions change on Alhaitham's face, momentarily stunned by what is a show more beautiful than any he's seen even at the Zubayr Theater. For someone usually so stoic, watching him go from relief to content to happy is something amazing, and it makes Kaveh smile in turn. (And this time, the tears welling in the corners of his eyes are there for a nice reason.) ]

If you're happy, then I'm happy too, Alhaitham.

[ After the soft kiss, his hands slip around to the back of the other's neck, one creeping up to curl into his hair once more, and Kaveh tugs him in close, pressing their mouths together anew, something for now that is soft and sweet. ]

[ The kiss is... it's what he's always wanted. He's been stuck here in this situation where he didn't know if his feelings would ever be reciprocated, if he'd ever even have a chance, but the dam has broken and things have finally been revealed. It's a cathartic feeling, one that he didn't expect.

And now they kiss and Alhaitham sinks into it. He kisses Kaveh back so tenderly, so achingly sweet, his arms sliding down to curl around Kaveh's torso and pull him flush against his body. One hand splays flat on Kaveh's back, at the window of the back of his shirt and the other curls upwards, clutching his shoulder from behind.

With that he's able to just focus on the kiss, tilting his head to deepen it somewhat and gives a soft, pleased noise as they kiss. This is, again, all he wanted. ]

[ As Alhaitham allows himself to sink into the kiss, so too does Kaveh. One of his hands rests on the younger's chest, right over his heart so he can feel it thrumming so fast, too fast; the other slips around his shoulders, fingers cupping the back of his neck and tugging him in closer.

Archons, he's wanted this for so long, and he's been so afraid, but it was always so simple— he's such an idiot—

His brain still working overtime, he tilts his own head in answer, welcoming the deeper kiss, allowing it to distract him, allowing the sound Alhaitham makes to fill his mind, warm and welcoming. This, this is all he needs, not those worries, those guilts. All he needs is right here in his arms.

His tongue flicks, tasting over the other's lips, along the seam, fingers splaying wider along the other's nape as if he can somehow tug them even closer still. ]

[ Alhaitham is so painfully stoic sometimes but he can't hide the beating of his heart, the way kissing Kaveh makes his body come alive with want and desire. He wants to sink into it and as he feels Kaveh's tongue slide across his lips, it's easy for him to open his mouth and give him access.

Then, all that they can do is taste each other and Alhaitham kisses even harder, clutches Kaveh even tighter. They're flush against each other now but Alhaitham feels the same urge that Kaveh feels, the need to be so close that there's nothing between them at all. It makes him ache, fingers curling against Kaveh, gripping him tighter.

He wonders briefly what Kaveh wants. Does he want to have sex? The idea makes a hot heat twist in Alhaitham's gut but he doesn't want to pressure Kaveh into anything. This is all still new to them both and kissing is... honestly, good enough for Alhaitham. As long as he has Kaveh in his arms, he's happy. ]

[ With Kaveh's mind still flicking from thought to thought despite his repeatedly trying to distract it and shut it up, it's not much of a surprise that it all too soon alights on the same topic that briefly wanders through Alhaitham's thoughts— especially given the way they're pressed together, his blood rushing to answer the pleasure of their kisses, of the knowledge that the other wants this just as much as he does.

But where Alhaitham holds back out of a want not to pressure Kaveh, the older man once in is all in, and the headiness of their kisses and the feeling of being so close to him like this is overwhelmingly good, and—

He breaks their kiss, tongue teasingly flickering against him on the way, although he hovers close, mouth pressing between his words against the corner of Alhaitham's mouth, his jaw, the line of his throat. ]

I know you told me to go to bed before. Is it.. is it too soon for me to ask you to join me there?

[ New or not, he knows what he wants— what he's wanted for a long time. ]

[ As Kaveh presses his lips to Alhaitham's mouth, to his jaw, to his throat, Alhaitham can't help the way his head tilts back and a shuddering sigh escapes his lips. His eyes fall closed and he swallows hard, trying to keep himself in check. He wants... he wants so much but he's not sure what he's allowed to have.

But then there's Kaveh's voice, offering himself up to Alhaitham, putting his desires on the table and making sure Alhaitham knows them. He drops his head back and opens his eyes again, staring right back at Kaveh as he thinks about it. One of his hands move to reach up, cupping Kaveh's cheek and sliding his thumb across the skin in a soft, affectionate gestures.

Kaveh wants to have sex. Kaveh wants to have sex with him. Alhaitham has had sex before, but not too much — he finds people too boring generally to put in the effort to get sex. But he likes sex and has imagined having sex with Kaveh a variety of times, hand usually around his cock while he does. So, he swallows hard and he nods, leaning in to brush his lips against Kaveh's mouth just briefly. ]

Okay. Let's go to your room.

[ If Kaveh wasn't already enamored by the sounds Alhaitham has made, that shuddering sigh would be enough to make him fall all over again, especially when succeeded by that swallow which, with his mouth against the other's throat, he can feel. It gives him confidence as he asks, and then he finds himself smiling as the other's hand cups his cheek to touch him, head tilting into the gentle stroke of his fingers.

And then Alhaitham agrees, and Kaveh's veins light with a rush of heat.

This is really happening. ]

Okay.

[ He doesn't really want to stop kissing him, stop touching him— but he does, slipping himself out from between Alhaitham and the wall and reaching out to grab his hand, tugging him along through the short distance between their rooms. That eagerness perhaps is evident though in the way he barely gets through his own bedroom door before turning to throw his arms around the other's shoulders again, mouth seeking his anew. ]

[ He's not expecting the eagerness Kaveh shows him, the enthusiasm. It's not that he doesn't feel the same but it's all a little surreal. This is happening. This is finally happening. He knows later he's going to look back at their text conversation and feel mildly ill, knowing what they were both so desperately trying to keep from each other but still needed to say.

His arms go around Kaveh's waist, clutching him to his body and sinking into the kiss with Kaveh. His head tilts down the little bit of a height difference they have and he kisses Kaveh as their lips meet again. A soft, pleased noise spills into the kiss as he deepens it hastily. He licks into Kaveh's mouth, sucks softly against his tongue, and moans quietly against him. This he does as he starts to walk them back towards Kaveh's bed, pulling Kaveh along with him.

The back of his knees hit the bed and he breaks the kiss to drop down onto the bed. Looking up at Kaveh with flushed skin and wet lips, he tugs him onto him, eagerly guiding him into a straddle before surging forward to kiss Kaveh some more. Then his hands are going to find the hem of Kaveh's shirt, sliding palms underneath it to roam against bare skin. ]

[ Every noise that Alhaitham makes is met with one from Kaveh's lips in answer as the blonde sinks all too willingly into their kiss, welcoming the feeling of the other against him. He follows as he's tugged back towards the bed, and starts to chase when Alhaitham sitting draws him back from the kiss— but then stops in the scant moments before the other tugs him down too.

And just looks.

His skin flushed, his lips wet from their kisses, pupils wider than they should be by rights, he looks more handsome than ever. Kaveh's heart thumps roughly in his chest, and his hand comes up to touch Alhaitham's cheek.

Gods, what a fool he is to have made them wait for so long—

The thought is interrupted by the tug, Kaveh following Alhaitham's guide until he's straddling him, answering his kiss eagerly, a soft sound on his own lips as hands touch the bare skin under his shirt. Unsure where he'd even start to begin with the other's clothes, though, he shifts his hips closer, pressing into the younger man. He wants Alhaitham to feel what he's doing to him, already half-hard in his pants— and finding the other in the same state makes him shudder and groan, fingers sliding into the younger's hair to tug him harder into their kiss. He lets his hips roll a few times, rocking them into each other and moaning into their kiss each time he does. ]

[ At the very least, Alhaitham is in house clothes so Kaveh doesn't need to explore the skin tight fabric of his usual shirt. It leaves him looking comfortably cozy underneath Kaveh, even with his skin flushed and his lips pink. When Kaveh moves to grind down against him, Alhaitham is more than happy to press up into Kaveh's motion and moans softly against Kaveh as a result.

He's half-hard and getting harder, aching in his pants with the strong desire to do more with Kaveh. He wants — he wants to fuck him, if he's honest with himself. The idea of Kaveh underneath him, moaning, losing himself, completely rabid with lust is all he can think about. He wants to make Kaveh feel good. He wants them to both feel good.

It's what has him changing their positions again. His hands clutch Kaveh around the waist, palms flat against his back underneath his shirt and then he uses his hips to lift Kaveh and press him back against the bed, rolling on top of him. From there it's easy to just kiss him into the mattress, hungry and wanting as their hips continue to grind against each other. ]

[ Alhaitham's moans are addictive. When he makes that sound, it's all he can do to rock his hips down again, enjoying too much the feel of the other's growing arousal against his own.

But it doesn't last long, because in the next moment he's clutched close, Alhaitham's hips lifting to roll them, pressing him back into the bed and pushing him back into the mattress in a way that has Kaveh gasp in shocked pleasure. It's even more obvious from this angle just how hard the younger man is getting, and he finds one hand dropping to cup around the back of his ass, dragging him in closer still. ]

Haitham.

[ It's a mumble against the other's lips. Suddenly, where to start doesn't really matter— he just wants him with less clothing. Both hands move to Alhaitham's waist, dragging his shirt up and over his abdomen and chest; even as he tries to part so he can keep pulling it up, he finds himself stealing breathless, needy kisses, moaning lowly into the other's mouth. ]

Gods— I want you.

[ It's so easy to pull his shirt off when Kaveh makes the effort to push it up his body. It's a natural next step really and he breaks from their kiss just long enough to do so, just long enough to push it off and toss it to the ground before diving back in for more kisses, more grinding.

He wants to make Kaveh moan some more. The sound of his pleasure is a new one and one that he's quickly realizing he likes, a lot. It leaves him feeling overwhelmed and hungry. When Kaveh speaks, mentions his desire for Alhaitham, Alhaitham's hips buck and he finds himself grinding harder down against Kaveh, gasping for breath as the urgent need to just touch and take and fuck fills him. ]

Kaveh —

[ His hands move, propping himself up on either side of Kaveh's head so he's looking down at him underneath him. His hips keep moving but now he's looking into Kaveh's face, eyes dark and intense with how much he wants the man underneath him. ]

We should get undressed. Do you have oil?

[ Some lubricant to make the slide better, so he can finger Kaveh open and fuck him. He doesn't want to hurt the man, doesn't know how long it's been since he's had something inside of him but. He knows he wants to fuck him and he'll spend as long as he needs to getting Kaveh prepped so he can do it. ]

[ There's a part of him that almost resists the kiss after Alhaitham has tugged his own shirt off. He wants to look at the other, admire him the way Kaveh thinks he deserves to be admired. But there'll be plenty of time for that later, he promises himself, and so he allows himself to sink into it, rewarding the other man with a fresh litany of moans when he grinds down harder against him.

He's panting by the time the younger pulls back from the kiss, his eyes dark with a lust that burns Kaveh to the core, makes him subconsciously lick his kiss-swollen lips as his desire-fogged mind struggles to understand what the other is saying to him.

Then, he nods. ]

Mm. In the side-table. Top drawer.

[ He indicates it with a brief wave of one hand. He'd move to get it himself, but he's kind of pinned into the mattress, and he doesn't want to move despite knowing that they have to in order to get this moving further. He's luxuriating, caught up in the feeling of the other pressed against him, and despite telling him where the oil is, his hands slip between them, one rubbing and pressing into Alhaitham's arousal even as the other starts to work at tugging his pants down. ]

[ Okay. That's his goal. Side-table. Top drawer. He needs to pull away from Kaveh long enough to grab it but then he feels Kaveh's hand slipping between them, pressing against his cock and all he can do is moan helplessly and sink back down into kissing Kaveh. He moves his mouth against him, licking into it and making the kiss heated as his hands move to Kaveh's pants to start pulling them down.

He has to lift his hips off of Kaveh to accomplish this but Kaveh's hand is still on his cock, able to feel just how hefty he is as well. Alhaitham is well endowed, large and thick even through his pants. He has every intention of pressing the whole of it into Kaveh, fucking him brainless with his cock. He eagerly anticipates it.

He'll finally pull back all the way, breaking the hold of Kaveh's hand on his arousal, as he sits back on his knees and pulls Kaveh's underwear and pants off fully. He tosses the fabric to the side then, hungry eyes taking in the exposed Kaveh underneath him before he goes to reach for the side table. Quickly, he hurries in getting the little bottle of lubricant before he pulls back to sit between Kaveh's legs again. ]

I need —

[ To keep kissing Kaveh, is what he thinks. He doesn't finish his sentence, instead leaning in to press his body on top of Kaveh's again and take his mouth in a kiss. He'll moan into it, eager and wanting, kissing Kaveh deeply as his hands also work on getting lubricant onto them so he can get at Kaveh's hole. ]

[ Admittedly, it's difficult for Kaveh to remove Alhaitham's pants while also fondling him quite so extensively. But his attention is quickly brought to the heft and girth of the other's arousal, a distraction at best; he finds his attention wavering away from stripping him and more at feeling him through his pants, touching and stroking even as he imagines how good that cock will feel fucking into him.

He actually whines a little when the younger man pulls back from him, despite it being for an entirely reasonable purpose. ]

Hurry— [ he demands, breathless, as the other removes his pants and grabs for the lubricant, and then for a moment he falls silent, a flush forming on his cheeks as the other just admires him—

and then Alhaitham is gasping out his need, and the moment is past, his shyness gone. Kaveh nods. ] Me too. [ He reaches out to wind his arms around the other, tugging him in close as Alhaitham presses back on top of him, and he answers the kiss eagerly. ]

Start with two. [ It's a whisper into the scribe's mouth as Kaveh spreads his legs for him, arching his hips to give him all the access he could want. ] I need you, I don't wanna wait.

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