[Alhaitham hums softly into that kiss, leaning into it, letting Kaveh feel the pressure of his fingers as he climaxes and then slowly drawing them free so the other man can catch his breath and pull his head back together.]
Good?
[Not a question that really needs to be answered he thinks, but he asks it with the smallest touch of a smile at the corners of his mouth.]
Kaveh... [His expression turns thoughtful then, quietly curious, one hand weaving into his hair and rubbing idly at his scalp with blunt fingertips.] I want to do something with you that no one else has. Can you think of anything like that?
[ There's soft whine on Kaveh's lips when Alhaitham pulls his fingers free, even as he nods his assent into the space between them, mumbles something about how yes, it was good, really goodβ not a question that really needs to be answered for sure, but answered anyway.
The haze is just starting to clear when the younger poses a new question of him, something that has the blonde blinking in confusion. Something he's never done with anyone else? The list is... embarrassingly small, and those things he hasn't done but wants to are those that seem somehow wrong for this particular moment.
But there's an odd feeling in his gut, a reluctance to tell Alhaitham "no", and so the scribe will see crimson eyes narrow in the same thoughtful expression as Kaveh mulls over a few options.
He's not sure he really wants to make himself any more vulnerable than he's already feeling right now, so... ]
Do you trust me? [ His voice is soft, a little shaky despite what he's about to suggest. ] I... there's something I... I'd like to try edging you.
[On the contrary the list of things Alhaitham hasn't done persists in being rather long, and failing Kaveh being able to come up with something he was sure he could manage it instead. There's the flicker of a thought of wanting something just for the two of them to share, something that no one else gets to have, and he wonders if that is a kind of foolish selfishness that neither of them can afford here.
The question makes him look up, meeting Kaveh's eyes with faint surprise. Does he trust him? Kaveh has never asked him that question and Alhaitham had never thought he would need to.
Of course he trusts him. He trusts Kaveh as someone who knows him better than anyone. As a person who acts as a mirror to himself, keeping him connected to the world in a way that no one else can. As someone that he would place his life in the hands of, if there was ever a need to do so, and know it would be well taken care of.
What he actually asks feels like nothing in comparison.]
... All right.
[A little thrill of anticipatory excitement burns in him for a moment.]
[ If Alhaitham is watching closely enough, he'll see the flicker of shock as it passes over Kaveh's face. Despite his making the suggestion, he really didn't think that the younger would agree to it. It's a loss of control at best, and he knows that the other isn't really fond of having control taken out of his hands. So even as the words left Kaveh's lips, he was sure the other would say noβ
Instead, he replies in the affirmative, and for a moment the blonde is taken off-guard. ]
Okay.
[ His answer is quiet, almost hesitant, but then he sits up, drawing the other with him and moving to nudge him back against the bed instead, hands drawing those strong arms above Alhaitham's head. ]
Your turn to keep them up here. [ His head tilts, momentarily playful. ] The cuffs are right there. I'll use them if I have to.
[ And then, after a moment, the seriousness coming back into his face and voice: ]
[Though he could easily overpower Kaveh when it comes to physical strength the shift in position is allowed without complaint and Alhaitham curls his fingers around the headrail after Kaveh pushes his arms up.
His eyes don't leave the other man's for a moment - quiet, calm, trusting as he looks at him - then he gives a small nod.]
I haven't forgotten.
[He might have brought Kaveh to climax once already but Alhaitham's only relief so far has been in the occasional chafing of his still-clothed cock against Kaveh's thigh. He's painfully turned on and it shows even through the fitted fabric of his trousers, and even more so as Kaveh moves him over onto his back.
He isn't embarrassed, but he does briefly glance down at himself.]
If you wouldn't mind... The clothes are new, and I don't want to have to have them professionally cleaned already.
[ In a lot of ways, Kaveh is still reeling at how quickly and easily things have shifted between them. Alhaitham's request is met with a nod on the blonde's part, eyes momentarily fixed on the visible strain between his legs, and he smiles, leaning into the space between the two of them to press his mouth to the other's chestβ and if he's being slow, leaving soft touches against the skin as he doesβ then it's definitely on purpose, and it's a good thing that Alhaitham seems to have better self-control than he does. ]
You should dress like this more often.
[ The statement comes without much room for thought on Kaveh's side, a small smile on his lips as his hand moves to the front of Alhaitham's crotch to rub over it slowly as his kisses work their way down the other's chest. ]
You looked kind of like a librarian from Mondstadt or something.
[ Then, he sits again, pulling back to watch as both hands start to work on undoing his pants, a curious tilt of his head as he looks up at the other man's face again. ]
[Kaveh would know as well as Alhaitham does that things would not have shifted this easily without the younger man's express desire that they do so, but it turns out that he doesn't mind the picture of Kaveh leaning over him like this.
His breathing hitches softly, drawn in between his teeth as the stimulation of the other man's hand makes his hips twitch, and his fingers briefly tighten around the headrail.]
If it's below my collar, you can bite me anywhere you please.
[That had always been the rule, though in fairness he had not clarified it the first time he had told Kaveh not to bite him. He shifts his hips in subconscious anticipation of having his pants pulled off.]
Unless you have a driving need to mark what's yours.
[ Kaveh's eyes shoot up, a momentarily amused look on his face as he shakes his head. Only an idiot would think that Kaveh somehow wanted to mark Alhaitham as his.
And yet, he thinks, as he works to pull the other's pants down and over his hips, catching his underwear with them so that the scribe's arousal can lift free of its confines (making Kaveh bite his lip as his eyes are drawn), and yet right now are they not doing something explicitly for the two of them? Something he's never done beforeβ something he presumes Alhaitham has never done before?
Doesn't that, in some small way, make Alhaitham his? ]
Don't be stupid.
[ The words are almost spat out, but the anger is more at himself than it is Alhaitham. With a sigh, he drops his mouth to leave kisses over the other man's chest, and at the same time he takes his erection into his hand, starting to please it with smooth, quick strokes. ]
[Stupid, hm? Seems that Kaveh has already forgotten the words and actions that he showed in the baths when Alhaitham was riding on him and he tried to claim the man as his own.
Conveniently forgotten... perhaps not forgotten at all. Alhaitham flexes his fingers slightly against the headrail again and breathes out a quiet exhale, his brow furrowing just slightly as Kaveh kisses across his chest and takes hold of his cock. He swallows, the next inhale shuddering slightly.]
[ He has forgotten, to a certain degree. With how addled his mind was that day, Kaveh has told himself that anything he said or did doesn't matter, and done his best to put it out of his mind completely. So he's not thinking about it at all, especially right now as he's trying to keep himself held together in the face of this.
Still, he smiles at the other's words, and nods. If something not visible is fair game, then he already knows what he wants to do; he straightens up just enough that he can shift down to the other's legs, starting to pump him slowly as he lowers his mouth to Alhaitham's thigh.
Like this, he can attack the skin with kisses and bites, suck it between his lips to bully it with his tongue. All the while, his hand continues to move, finding a steady pace, fingers tightening and easing just a little with each stroke, exploring over his tip and smudging through the precum. ]
[The way that his hands keep twitching and flexing against the headrail speak volumes of how much he wants to touch the head between his thighs. Alhaitham's breathing catches, he gasps softly, and between the dual sensation of Kaveh's hand on his cock and the teeth and tongue drawing up a mark on the firm skin of his inner thigh one of his arms drops.
He touches Kaveh's hair.
Gently, at first. The other man may not even notice how Alhaitham's fingertips skim over blond locks, but then his fingers lightly weave into them and lightly grip, just enough to be felt but not enough for force Kaveh's head to move at all.
And should Kaveh take that moment to look at him he would find Alhaitham flushed, his pupils large and dark, sweat darkening the small wisps of ashen grey at his hairline.]
He told Alhaitham he wasn't allowed to touch, that he had to keep his hands up against the headrail.
It's barely been minutes, and there are fingers in his hair, weaving and gripping, and crimson eyes shoot up to meet the other's face.
What he finds there completely takes away his ability to be unhappy about it. A shaky breath gusts over the bruise he's left on the scribe's thigh, heart clenching in his chest as he reaches up to gently touch the other's wrist. ]
What did I say about no touching, mm Haitham?
[ But there really is no anger in his voice. He sits up, gently moves the other's hand back to the headrail, and holds it against it for a silent moment or two. ]
If you touch me again, I really will put the cuffs on you.
[ He shifts back to where he was, another breath over the skin. ]
I wanna do it the first time with my mouth. Any complaints?
[He doesn't expect that Kaveh will actually be annoyed by his disobedience. Nor, he thinks, would he actually consent to having his hands bound. He can behave himself if he sets his mind to doing so, but in the moment it was simply impossible to resist reaching out.
And he absolutely does not regret it.
His brow furrows softly at the question. Kaveh has suggested this before, more than once, and each time Alhaitham has refused because the idea of it just did not appeal to him. Even now he isn't sure, not really, but the thought of the older man's mouth on his cock sends a tingle of anticipation across his skin. He swallows, watching him for a moment, then shakes his head.]
Only a compromise.
[And he moves his hand down from where Kaveh had pushed it back up to the headrail, lightly brushing his fingertips to the blond man's jaw.]
[ He blinks, and his lips part in a questionβ a compromise?β that goes unasked as Alhaitham's fingertips brush along his jaw... and just like that, he's won over, no plan in mind of even starting to bind the other's wrists.
(And the funny part is that it's less about getting to finally please Alhaitham with his mouth and more about the fact that the scribe apparently wants to touch him enough that he would bargain for it.)
Kaveh pushes that thought aside and licks his lips, pausing to nod up at Alhaitham. ]
Okay. But just my hair and my face for now, alright?
[ And he waits, pausing his ministrations and movements while he does, perhaps a little to tease the other man, but also because he's not sure he can focus on any answer the other should give when preparing to go down on him. ]
[A compromise. Alhaitham is capable of them as Kaveh well knows, as much as he often presents himself as someone utterly unmoving for such things, but this is certainly one of which the older man would never have seen the like before.]
Mm. That is all I want.
[No grabbing, no pushing, only the light touch of his fingers in Kaveh's hair. He brushes his fingertips over the blond locks, tracking the movement of his hand for a moment before his gaze shifts back as Kaveh pauses.]
[ It takes him a moment to adjust when Alhaitham stops talking; unfortunately for him, in that short time, the other has noticed his pause and is asking, checking in on him as if something were wrong. A light flush comes to his cheeks, and Kaveh lifts his head to shake it, smiling faintly. ]
No, it's nothing. I was just waiting to hear what you said. I want you to be able to focus completely on this, after all. Show you what you've been missing.
[ The words are cheeky, not quite matching his toneβ his tone, laced with uncertainty because why should he have lost himself over something as small as this? And why is he thinking so much about how he needs to blow Alhaitham's mind with his efforts?
No pun intended.
Another smile, and Kaveh leans over him, hand cupping and stroking lightly around the base of his shaft as his mouth closes over the tip, tongue flickering over the skin and tasting. ]
['Show you what you've been missing', he says, and Alhaitham lets out a little huff of air through his nose. He's still not entirely sure about this, only allowing it because it is Kaveh and quite ready to call a stop to it the moment he decides whether or not he enjoys it through experience. At least they are both of sound mind now and he can trust it to stop if he doesn't like it after all.
Admittedly, there is something enticing about having the older man between his thighs like that. The image is definitely not an unpleasant one.
Still, he twitches and makes a soft sound, his expression pinching as Kaveh's mouth closes around the tip of his cock. He inhales sharply, his hand tightening around the headrail while the other stays resting lightly on the other man's head, unable to deny the definite tingle of pleasure that sparks through him at the sensation.
It's different to being inside him or having a hand around his length. Warm and wet. His brow furrows slightly as his legs shift restlessly for a moment, heels digging against the bed sheets.
But he doesn't say anything, so Kaveh can assume that he's fine for now. Alhaitham hasn't taken his eyes off him yet.]
[ The sharp inhale is practically music to Kaveh's ears, and paired with the fact that Alhaitham doesn't tell him to stop, he takes it as a positive sign. After all, despite his bravado, he knows all too well that the other has been hesitant to accept this from him, even if he doesn't know why.
Maybe that's why he needs it to be amazing.
Part of him wants to watch the expressions play out over Alhaitham's face, but for now at least he can't help the way his eyes close as he starts to work himself slowly against him, staying just around the head at first and then dipping slightly lower, taking him slowly deeper as he explores every last inch of skin with lips and tongue in turn. Where his mouth doesn't yet reach, his fingers continue slowly stroking, matching his exploratory pace.
He hums his content as his tongue swipes out over the head again, tasting the precum beading at the slit. This is what he wantedβ ]
[He tries to settle into it. To enjoy it for what it is. There's an undeniable aspect of pleasure to the whole thing as his body reacts but as Kaveh continues Alhaitham realises one thing with absolute, crystal clear certainty.
He does not like this.
The shivers racing across him give way to an uncomfortable sensation of his skin crawling as he shifts again, nudges his palm against Kaveh's forehead and then fully pushes him back. Alhaitham half sits up, his gaze wavering and uncharacteristically unsure as he shakes his head.]
Stop.
[Truth be told he does have an idea of why Kaveh has been so insistent on it. Maybe for anyone else it would be a grand experience, but for Alhaitham himself the lack of appeal is showing itself quite clearly in the evident waning of his arousal.
He frowns, trying to work through his own thoughts.]
I don'tβ... I don't want that from you. Or anyone.
[ Kaveh stops before Alhaitham even tells him to do so, taking his cue from the palm pressed flat against his forehead to push him away. For a moment, red eyes look up unblinking and wide, and then back at the other's flagging arousal, and as he swipes the back of his hand across his mouth the most horrible, uncomfortable feeling sinks deep in his skin, andβ ]
I'm sorryβ
[ But he falls silent again because Alhaitham is talking.
I don't want that from you. Or anyone.
He swallows hard, looking up at him with a small smile, even as it quavers on his lips. It's not about him, he has to tell himself. It's not that Alhaitham doesn't want him. It's something about the sensation, it's not a rejection..
It's not a rejection.
A deep breath, and his smile strengthens, something genuine and gentle. ]
Okay. That's okay. [ Maybe later he'll ask him about it, find out what it is he doesn't like so that he knows for the future. But right now he doesn't wanna spoil the mood, soβ ]
[It isn't a rejection of Kaveh. Gods, he isn't sure if there is anyone in any world he could want more even if that one particular act was a non-starter. He decides to work through the complicated tangle of thoughts around his refusal to continue later rather than being distracted by them now and meets Kaveh's eyes in quiet contemplation as he considers.
What does he want? In real terms sex has held so little space in his thoughts over the years that he has never given much consideration to that kind of question. He's learning all kinds of things these days. What he likes and doesn't like in settings far more intimate than he ever imagined himself in.
So, what does he want?
He sits up straight and takes hold of one of Kaveh's hands, only lightly snagging it. His fingers don't take grip but trail down the man's forearm instead, ghosting across his skin until they reach Kaveh's chest. What does he want? Something... else.
Alhaitham pulls Kaveh to him and kisses him, one hand splayed flat to his chest while the other digs gently into his hair. The pad of his thumb strokes a slow trail around the shell of his companion's ear.]
[ For a moment, Kaveh really isn't sure what the scribe is going to say. Especially as the other man sits up, he wonders to himself if the encounter is over for nowβ and something deep and primal knots itself up, stomach rolling at the knowledge that he doesn't want it to be
(but he'll do what Alhaitham wants, of course, he'll always do whatever it is Alhaitham wants, no matter how much it hurts him)
but then a hand ghosts over his skin, a grip pulling him close and into a gentle, tender kiss, and all the anxiety unwinds itself as Kaveh all but melts into him, both arms moving to circle around the other's shoulders.
I want you close, Alhaitham says, and Kaveh's heart does something weird in his chest, causing an unbidden sound on his lips, half-sob and half-murmur. A breath to stabilize himself and: ]
Okay. [ A hand winds itself up into the scribe's hair from where it rests at the nape; the other drops from around his shoulder to rest at his waist. ] What if... what if we stay like this, and I use my hand? Does thatβ is that good?
[That sound prompts a semi-foreign feeling in the centre of Alhaitham's chest. He is already relatively sure of his feelings towards the other man - in a way that he has, if he is honest, been for some time - but he has his reasons for keeping his silence on the matter.
Not the least of which being that he knows Kaveh so well.
The suggestion is absorbed quietly, Alhaitham's attention sliding offside for a moment, then he takes a quick breath and nods.]
That sounds better.
[He isn't used to these missteps. To not feeling entirely sure of himself even if he is very certain of what he likes and does not like. It's good to have a clear head for once, and yet...]
[ And his hand shifts that little lower, taking Alhaitham's flagging arousal into its grip and starting to slowly stroke along it. His forehead remains pressed against the other man's, his eyes shutβ there's a fear deep down in him that he doesn't even fully recognize, a fear that tells him that if he opens his eyes right now, this whole thing will have to end.
He does, however, tilt his head enough that he can kiss the younger again, lips locking into his as his hand continues to move at a slow, steady pace, thumb rubbing over the head in the same way his tongue did just a few moments before.
Whatever disappointment he feels is supplanted by two different things: the need, first, for Alhaitham to enjoy this, to feel good in whatever they're doing,
and something else that hinges on a question he's not ready to ask, let alone answer.
[Alhaitham, conversely, keeps his eyes open to study the older man's face as they stay close to one another. That is, until their lips meet again, when his eyelids snap shut and he leans gently into it. One thing can be said for sure - when it comes to kissing Kaveh, he definitely does enjoy it.
Those faint prickles of arousal start up again and the difference in his body's reactions is immediately evident. Rather than those vaguely uncomfortable twitches and restless shifting he slides his hands lightly over Kaveh's skin, one on his thigh and the other slipping around the shallow dip of his waist, clearly far more at ease.
He tugs the older man closer, almost into his lap, smiling a little against his lips as he snatches a breath between kisses. His cock firms again against the slow slide of Kaveh's palm and the teasing touch of his thumb over the head and his breathing shivers, eyes half-lidded when they part for long enough to look at each other.]
It was not a comment on your prowess. You do understand that, don't you.
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indigently) wrote2024-01-04 08:20 pm
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Good?
[Not a question that really needs to be answered he thinks, but he asks it with the smallest touch of a smile at the corners of his mouth.]
Kaveh... [His expression turns thoughtful then, quietly curious, one hand weaving into his hair and rubbing idly at his scalp with blunt fingertips.] I want to do something with you that no one else has. Can you think of anything like that?
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The haze is just starting to clear when the younger poses a new question of him, something that has the blonde blinking in confusion. Something he's never done with anyone else? The list is... embarrassingly small, and those things he hasn't done but wants to are those that seem somehow wrong for this particular moment.
But there's an odd feeling in his gut, a reluctance to tell Alhaitham "no", and so the scribe will see crimson eyes narrow in the same thoughtful expression as Kaveh mulls over a few options.
He's not sure he really wants to make himself any more vulnerable than he's already feeling right now, so... ]
Do you trust me? [ His voice is soft, a little shaky despite what he's about to suggest. ] I... there's something I... I'd like to try edging you.
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The question makes him look up, meeting Kaveh's eyes with faint surprise. Does he trust him? Kaveh has never asked him that question and Alhaitham had never thought he would need to.
Of course he trusts him. He trusts Kaveh as someone who knows him better than anyone. As a person who acts as a mirror to himself, keeping him connected to the world in a way that no one else can. As someone that he would place his life in the hands of, if there was ever a need to do so, and know it would be well taken care of.
What he actually asks feels like nothing in comparison.]
... All right.
[A little thrill of anticipatory excitement burns in him for a moment.]
Then do that.
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Instead, he replies in the affirmative, and for a moment the blonde is taken off-guard. ]
Okay.
[ His answer is quiet, almost hesitant, but then he sits up, drawing the other with him and moving to nudge him back against the bed instead, hands drawing those strong arms above Alhaitham's head. ]
Your turn to keep them up here. [ His head tilts, momentarily playful. ] The cuffs are right there. I'll use them if I have to.
[ And then, after a moment, the seriousness coming back into his face and voice: ]
Remember, the word is Alcazarzaray. Alright?
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His eyes don't leave the other man's for a moment - quiet, calm, trusting as he looks at him - then he gives a small nod.]
I haven't forgotten.
[He might have brought Kaveh to climax once already but Alhaitham's only relief so far has been in the occasional chafing of his still-clothed cock against Kaveh's thigh. He's painfully turned on and it shows even through the fitted fabric of his trousers, and even more so as Kaveh moves him over onto his back.
He isn't embarrassed, but he does briefly glance down at himself.]
If you wouldn't mind... The clothes are new, and I don't want to have to have them professionally cleaned already.
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You should dress like this more often.
[ The statement comes without much room for thought on Kaveh's side, a small smile on his lips as his hand moves to the front of Alhaitham's crotch to rub over it slowly as his kisses work their way down the other's chest. ]
You looked kind of like a librarian from Mondstadt or something.
[ Then, he sits again, pulling back to watch as both hands start to work on undoing his pants, a curious tilt of his head as he looks up at the other man's face again. ]
Are "no biting" rules still in place, Haitham?
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His breathing hitches softly, drawn in between his teeth as the stimulation of the other man's hand makes his hips twitch, and his fingers briefly tighten around the headrail.]
If it's below my collar, you can bite me anywhere you please.
[That had always been the rule, though in fairness he had not clarified it the first time he had told Kaveh not to bite him. He shifts his hips in subconscious anticipation of having his pants pulled off.]
Unless you have a driving need to mark what's yours.
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And yet, he thinks, as he works to pull the other's pants down and over his hips, catching his underwear with them so that the scribe's arousal can lift free of its confines (making Kaveh bite his lip as his eyes are drawn), and yet right now are they not doing something explicitly for the two of them? Something he's never done beforeβ something he presumes Alhaitham has never done before?
Doesn't that, in some small way, make Alhaitham his? ]
Don't be stupid.
[ The words are almost spat out, but the anger is more at himself than it is Alhaitham. With a sigh, he drops his mouth to leave kisses over the other man's chest, and at the same time he takes his erection into his hand, starting to please it with smooth, quick strokes. ]
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[Stupid, hm? Seems that Kaveh has already forgotten the words and actions that he showed in the baths when Alhaitham was riding on him and he tried to claim the man as his own.
Conveniently forgotten... perhaps not forgotten at all. Alhaitham flexes his fingers slightly against the headrail again and breathes out a quiet exhale, his brow furrowing just slightly as Kaveh kisses across his chest and takes hold of his cock. He swallows, the next inhale shuddering slightly.]
Regardless, I meant what I said.
[Anything below the collar is fair game.]
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Still, he smiles at the other's words, and nods. If something not visible is fair game, then he already knows what he wants to do; he straightens up just enough that he can shift down to the other's legs, starting to pump him slowly as he lowers his mouth to Alhaitham's thigh.
Like this, he can attack the skin with kisses and bites, suck it between his lips to bully it with his tongue. All the while, his hand continues to move, finding a steady pace, fingers tightening and easing just a little with each stroke, exploring over his tip and smudging through the precum. ]
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He touches Kaveh's hair.
Gently, at first. The other man may not even notice how Alhaitham's fingertips skim over blond locks, but then his fingers lightly weave into them and lightly grip, just enough to be felt but not enough for force Kaveh's head to move at all.
And should Kaveh take that moment to look at him he would find Alhaitham flushed, his pupils large and dark, sweat darkening the small wisps of ashen grey at his hairline.]
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He told Alhaitham he wasn't allowed to touch, that he had to keep his hands up against the headrail.
It's barely been minutes, and there are fingers in his hair, weaving and gripping, and crimson eyes shoot up to meet the other's face.
What he finds there completely takes away his ability to be unhappy about it. A shaky breath gusts over the bruise he's left on the scribe's thigh, heart clenching in his chest as he reaches up to gently touch the other's wrist. ]
What did I say about no touching, mm Haitham?
[ But there really is no anger in his voice. He sits up, gently moves the other's hand back to the headrail, and holds it against it for a silent moment or two. ]
If you touch me again, I really will put the cuffs on you.
[ He shifts back to where he was, another breath over the skin. ]
I wanna do it the first time with my mouth. Any complaints?
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And he absolutely does not regret it.
His brow furrows softly at the question. Kaveh has suggested this before, more than once, and each time Alhaitham has refused because the idea of it just did not appeal to him. Even now he isn't sure, not really, but the thought of the older man's mouth on his cock sends a tingle of anticipation across his skin. He swallows, watching him for a moment, then shakes his head.]
Only a compromise.
[And he moves his hand down from where Kaveh had pushed it back up to the headrail, lightly brushing his fingertips to the blond man's jaw.]
I want to touch you.
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(And the funny part is that it's less about getting to finally please Alhaitham with his mouth and more about the fact that the scribe apparently wants to touch him enough that he would bargain for it.)
Kaveh pushes that thought aside and licks his lips, pausing to nod up at Alhaitham. ]
Okay. But just my hair and my face for now, alright?
[ And he waits, pausing his ministrations and movements while he does, perhaps a little to tease the other man, but also because he's not sure he can focus on any answer the other should give when preparing to go down on him. ]
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Mm. That is all I want.
[No grabbing, no pushing, only the light touch of his fingers in Kaveh's hair. He brushes his fingertips over the blond locks, tracking the movement of his hand for a moment before his gaze shifts back as Kaveh pauses.]
... What is it?
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No, it's nothing. I was just waiting to hear what you said. I want you to be able to focus completely on this, after all. Show you what you've been missing.
[ The words are cheeky, not quite matching his toneβ his tone, laced with uncertainty because why should he have lost himself over something as small as this? And why is he thinking so much about how he needs to blow Alhaitham's mind with his efforts?
No pun intended.
Another smile, and Kaveh leans over him, hand cupping and stroking lightly around the base of his shaft as his mouth closes over the tip, tongue flickering over the skin and tasting. ]
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Admittedly, there is something enticing about having the older man between his thighs like that. The image is definitely not an unpleasant one.
Still, he twitches and makes a soft sound, his expression pinching as Kaveh's mouth closes around the tip of his cock. He inhales sharply, his hand tightening around the headrail while the other stays resting lightly on the other man's head, unable to deny the definite tingle of pleasure that sparks through him at the sensation.
It's different to being inside him or having a hand around his length. Warm and wet. His brow furrows slightly as his legs shift restlessly for a moment, heels digging against the bed sheets.
But he doesn't say anything, so Kaveh can assume that he's fine for now. Alhaitham hasn't taken his eyes off him yet.]
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Maybe that's why he needs it to be amazing.
Part of him wants to watch the expressions play out over Alhaitham's face, but for now at least he can't help the way his eyes close as he starts to work himself slowly against him, staying just around the head at first and then dipping slightly lower, taking him slowly deeper as he explores every last inch of skin with lips and tongue in turn. Where his mouth doesn't yet reach, his fingers continue slowly stroking, matching his exploratory pace.
He hums his content as his tongue swipes out over the head again, tasting the precum beading at the slit. This is what he wantedβ ]
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He does not like this.
The shivers racing across him give way to an uncomfortable sensation of his skin crawling as he shifts again, nudges his palm against Kaveh's forehead and then fully pushes him back. Alhaitham half sits up, his gaze wavering and uncharacteristically unsure as he shakes his head.]
Stop.
[Truth be told he does have an idea of why Kaveh has been so insistent on it. Maybe for anyone else it would be a grand experience, but for Alhaitham himself the lack of appeal is showing itself quite clearly in the evident waning of his arousal.
He frowns, trying to work through his own thoughts.]
I don'tβ... I don't want that from you. Or anyone.
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I'm sorryβ
[ But he falls silent again because Alhaitham is talking.
I don't want that from you. Or anyone.
He swallows hard, looking up at him with a small smile, even as it quavers on his lips. It's not about him, he has to tell himself. It's not that Alhaitham doesn't want him. It's something about the sensation, it's not a rejection..
It's not a rejection.
A deep breath, and his smile strengthens, something genuine and gentle. ]
Okay. That's okay. [ Maybe later he'll ask him about it, find out what it is he doesn't like so that he knows for the future. But right now he doesn't wanna spoil the mood, soβ ]
Will you tell me what you do want from me?
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What does he want? In real terms sex has held so little space in his thoughts over the years that he has never given much consideration to that kind of question. He's learning all kinds of things these days. What he likes and doesn't like in settings far more intimate than he ever imagined himself in.
So, what does he want?
He sits up straight and takes hold of one of Kaveh's hands, only lightly snagging it. His fingers don't take grip but trail down the man's forearm instead, ghosting across his skin until they reach Kaveh's chest. What does he want? Something... else.
Alhaitham pulls Kaveh to him and kisses him, one hand splayed flat to his chest while the other digs gently into his hair. The pad of his thumb strokes a slow trail around the shell of his companion's ear.]
I want you close.
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(but he'll do what Alhaitham wants, of course, he'll always do whatever it is Alhaitham wants, no matter how much it hurts him)
but then a hand ghosts over his skin, a grip pulling him close and into a gentle, tender kiss, and all the anxiety unwinds itself as Kaveh all but melts into him, both arms moving to circle around the other's shoulders.
I want you close, Alhaitham says, and Kaveh's heart does something weird in his chest, causing an unbidden sound on his lips, half-sob and half-murmur. A breath to stabilize himself and: ]
Okay. [ A hand winds itself up into the scribe's hair from where it rests at the nape; the other drops from around his shoulder to rest at his waist. ] What if... what if we stay like this, and I use my hand? Does thatβ is that good?
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Not the least of which being that he knows Kaveh so well.
The suggestion is absorbed quietly, Alhaitham's attention sliding offside for a moment, then he takes a quick breath and nods.]
That sounds better.
[He isn't used to these missteps. To not feeling entirely sure of himself even if he is very certain of what he likes and does not like. It's good to have a clear head for once, and yet...]
Mm. That should be good.
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[ And his hand shifts that little lower, taking Alhaitham's flagging arousal into its grip and starting to slowly stroke along it. His forehead remains pressed against the other man's, his eyes shutβ there's a fear deep down in him that he doesn't even fully recognize, a fear that tells him that if he opens his eyes right now, this whole thing will have to end.
He does, however, tilt his head enough that he can kiss the younger again, lips locking into his as his hand continues to move at a slow, steady pace, thumb rubbing over the head in the same way his tongue did just a few moments before.
Whatever disappointment he feels is supplanted by two different things: the need, first, for Alhaitham to enjoy this, to feel good in whatever they're doing,
and something else that hinges on a question he's not ready to ask, let alone answer.
The first is enough for now. ]
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Those faint prickles of arousal start up again and the difference in his body's reactions is immediately evident. Rather than those vaguely uncomfortable twitches and restless shifting he slides his hands lightly over Kaveh's skin, one on his thigh and the other slipping around the shallow dip of his waist, clearly far more at ease.
He tugs the older man closer, almost into his lap, smiling a little against his lips as he snatches a breath between kisses. His cock firms again against the slow slide of Kaveh's palm and the teasing touch of his thumb over the head and his breathing shivers, eyes half-lidded when they part for long enough to look at each other.]
It was not a comment on your prowess. You do understand that, don't you.
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